Pens Crap the Bed; Free Candy Break Down

I'm not even gonna try to recap Game 5.  And I spent most of the 2nd half burying my face in some tasty chicken fajitas (grilled by yours truly), so any "analysis" on my part would be half-assed.  All I know is this: we better get it done tonight.  I don't want a Game 7.  Not because I don't think we can win a home Game 7 (which would be against the trend), but I really wanna see Mogwai Wednesday night (go sports!).

Illegal (?) and suspendable (?) hits have been the talk of the 1st round. Mike (leadership) Richards'  boarding call which injured Tim Connolly (out for Game 7) was one of the latest. And then there was Bryan Bickell leaving his feet last night in Chicago (but anything behind the net is legal, from what we've learned). Colin Campbell (hey guys!) is not the greatest professor of Legal Hits 101, so this lesson has been pretty confusing to say the least. But from what we can hypothesize, this is the perfect legal hockey check...



Elbow stays down, feet never leave the ice, not in the back, and not to an un-expecting player.  Not boarding, didn't use his stick, and didn't punch him in the face afterward.  Hit took place behind the net.  Didn't trash talk his opponent.  Colin Campbell said, "hey guys, it was a good hit, haven't you ever played hockey?" after watching the replay.  He isn't Matt Cooke, and he doesn't even wear the same # as Matt Cooke.  How could he?  He's on the same team.  The player getting hit is not Marc Savard.  He doesn't propel himself.  He doesn't launch himself.  The player being hit isn't a star player.  He's not a repeat offender.  He doesn't have a reputation for this sorta thing.  It's a hockey play (c'mon guys).  He's on an Original Six team, and he's from Canada.  (c'mon guys). 

Learn the rules, ass clowns.