TWO POINTS!!! TWO POINTS!!!!

WE GOT TWO POINTS!!! PENS WIN! A Power Play Goal was scored! YAY!!! YAY!!!

Ok, to go along with the brand new Pens winning streak, we've got TWO (Count 'em 2!!) New Years' Revolutions for Empties Crushed:

1) No more negative talk about the Pens. All your negative energy JUST MAKES ME STRONGER!

2) You, the loyal readers of EC deserve better...all five of you. Empties Crushed brings you this solemn promise (I put it to you, Greg!)...Not a SINGLE EFFIN DAY will go by in 2009 without a post from EC. And I've got Dan Yost's back on this. As a matter of fact, DY was just telling me the other day..."If a day goes by, and there is not a single post on Empties Crushed, then you can punch me (Dan Yost) in the face."

Now as optimistic as the staff of EC is, we realize this is a lofty goal. What...with games to see, Bob to be heard, shows to attend, drinks to drink...this will be a tough task indeed. So the quality or the length of said daily posts may not always be up to what you've come to expect here. But there will be an EFFIN POST. For the love of Steven Gerrard, there will be a post.

Ruslan Fedotenko is out a month, after breaking his hand on Colby Armstrong's face. Now I love Colby just as much as the next Yinzer, but I cheer for the logo on the front of the jersey, NOT the name on the back...

Pens Season. D.U.N.

YEAH WE GOT A LOT OF LOSSES!!!

I'd already stuck the tip of the fork into the Pens for the year after home tit peelings courtesy of Toronto, Boston, and Florida. It's now firmly planted. I can't think of a Penguins game in recent memory that I was less jackt to see than last night's Rangers game in MSG. Another predictable loser. The only thing that could've salvaged some sanctity is if I would've bet against them. Looking back on a month's worth of losses...I can't believe I haven't taken advantage of the Pens recent woes by wagering against them and fattening my wallet.

There are so many issues with this team right now, it's depressing. And it's not a matter of getting a bounce or two. We're WAY beyond that.:

• The team's best winger is an aging Petr Sykora.
• Without Ziggy, we can't win a face-off.
• The Power Play is BRUTAL.
• As good as he is, Malkin turns the puck over in bad spots WAY too often.
• The entire team turns the puck over in bad spots way too often.
• I'm convinced. Miro Satan was a mistake.
• One, if not Two, of these Defenesemen need to get traded.
• Therrien is running out of line change options.
• The Power Play is BRUTAL.
• We have ZERO physical presence, both in the corners and more importantly in front of the net.
• Max Talbot!! Superstar!!!! -15?!?!
• If we're lucky enough to get to a shootout, it's an automatic loss due to sphincter tightness.
  
• #87 is playing the worst hockey of his NHL career.
• All of the above is getting to Fleury's head.

Here's the good news:

• We're the best passing team in the league. We are so good at passing the puck. We pass the puck from Point to Point better than anyone in the NHL.
• We're pretty good at cycling the puck. No need to get to the front of the net, mind you, but cycling the puck with zero chance of creating an opportunity to score is our forte.
• Our drop passes look so pretty.

I'm tired.

If you're not a Pens fan, and don't like Sid, you'll rip him for this scuffle saying he jumped Brett McLean. I say it's hilarious. Sid challenged McLean prior to the drop, and proceeds to use him as a dish rag...

I never realized...

that during an "official review", there has to be "indisputable evidence" to overturn the call on the field.

So, I guess what this means, is that we must always remember what the call ON THE FIELD was...because it becomes very important in these situations. I'm glad these play-by-play guys cleared this up for me, because I was very confused.

You Are Looking Live!

Oh, the naivete of Brent Musburger. With Penn St trailing by 14 with under a minute left to play, Brent seemed puzzled at how hard Nittany Lion fans were rooting for one last TD, despite the outcome being already decided in USC's favor.

C'mon dude. You don't actually believe that everyone's tuning in for all 12 minutes of exhilarating action that takes place over the 4 hour period?!?!? 4 hour football games without a rooting interest, either team-wise or financially speaking, are simply unwatchable.

OHH NO YOU DIDN'T!

This is John Mirasty versus Jeremy Yablonski in a December 19th game between the Syracuse Crunch and the Brimingham Senators.

Zidane wouldn't have stood a chance.

The Ravens have Male Cheerleaders.

Repeat: The Baltimore Ravens have Male Cheerleaders

stop me if you think that you've heard this one before...

Thanks to Kono for the heads up!! Morrissey is playing Pittsburgh's Carnegie Music Hall...St. Patrick's Day. TIX ON SALE FRIDAY (TOMORROW!!!) at 5:00 pm.

TICKET BASTARD LINK HERE.

I wouldn't plan on hearing any Smiths stuff, but should be a splendid time anyhow. Just hope he doesn't cancel due to illness, as has been the case the last two times.

about 2 weeks late...

busy busy.

Thanks Rohde!

ESPN, The Cowboys, and Double Standards

As I'm sure you've noticed, the Steelers beat the Cowboys last week. Furthermore, the loss has Dallas' team chemistry dropping faster than a 14 year-old kid's balls when he sees his first porn. Or, at least, that's what ESPN's Ed Werder is telling us.




Ed's "anonymous source" is telling him that players are ready to go to blows, that T.O. is getting players to go against Tony Romo, and that it is a locker room divided. It's a story custom made for the 24-hour, in-your-face, always a breaking story atmosphere the the worldwide leader pushed. Or, is it?

Go back to a couple weeks ago, when Fox Sports was reporting that Brett Favre made a phone call to the Lions to give Detriot the inside edge. Well, it didn't work, but the story, based on "anonymous sources," had picked up steam around the interwebs and everywhere else, except ESPN. At that time, the story was non-existent in Bristol, even as far as to have a memo released on the subject.

So, what makes Brett Favre stories off-limits when you can't attach a name to them, while T.O. and Dallas stories are fair game? While, taking the racist angle is sexier and more fun, I'll go with the "need to curry the favor of a soon-to-be retired football Demi-God so that he'll work for us in the future" side of things.

However, I wouldn't suggest telling "TWWL" or Mr. Werder that they may be less-than-consistent in their reporting standards. You might get a ESPN p.a. telling you that you probably don't have a job.


AWESOME!!!



FOOTIE UPDATE





The Royals, winners today! Reading has won four straight and has taken points in eight of their last nine. See you all mo-fo's in the PLM next season.



Fortuna Dusseldorf

Huge fixture tomorrow against Werder Bremen II, F.D. will be moving back into third tomorrow, and will be promoted into 2Bundesliga next season. Get pumped!

Tyler Kennedy Out 4-6 weeks

Could be worse. It could be Bryant McFadden.

so I've been in a real Beat Happening mood lately...

7th favorite band of all-time. Love these guys...

"Hot Chocolate Boy":



and I seriously gotta party with these dudes. We're BAD...



Live in Olympia, "Midnight A-Go-Go." OMG!! How kick ass this would have been...



Some TV show appearance, doing "Black Candy"...

1st PLACE

You can now find ALL of 'My Teams' atop their respective table. Check the standings grandma.

England
Italy
Spain

I'm not sayin. I'm just sayin.

And if you REALLY want to get technical about it, seeing that MLS 2009 doesn't start until next Spring, we can say that the Beloved TFC is also tied for first place, or will be before the season starts.

Huge Footie Saturday on tap:

Liverpool v. Blackburn: 10:00am at Piper's Pub
Inter v. Lazio: 2:30 on FSC
Barca v. The 3rd place Yellow Submarine: 4:00 on GOLTV

And nobody's pumpt?

Excuse me, do you have the latest Depeche Mode album?

Yeah. But it sucks.

The Kids in the Hall are returning, kids.

But first...The Whores!

Asshat: Plaxico Burress

With some exceptions, an asshat is usually earned with a full body of work. Barry Bonds, “Adam” Pac-Man Jones, Terrell Owens, and Sean Salisbury are all fine examples of people who built up a quality resume of asshat behavior before finding their way to CSC or EC’s hallowed grounds. It is with this in mind that I take my first foray into asshat induction writing.
A self-inflicted gunshot wound aside, Burress has had an asshat coming for quite sometime. “Plex,” who is making $3.25 million to not extend himself out over the middle, has already been suspended by the Giants for missing a team meeting. Not the first time he’s felt the need to skip work, The Steelers suspended him back in May of ’04 for exactly the same thing. This, is in addition to an endless line of fines levied against him by the Giants for being late to meetings and practice. However, three and quarter mill may not be enough to stay with a Super bowl winning team, as Burress sat out as long as humanly possible in order to force the Giants into giving him a new contract. We see who won that battle. So, what have the Giants gotten in exchange for this endless pain in the ass? Let’s go to the numbers.


His salary, pro-rated for the 11 games so far, looks like this…
$63,839 per catch
$4,922 per receiving yard
$558,594 per touchdown

Dude, your right. I have no idea how you can allow yourself to play for such meager wages. You are money.




According to SI the average wide out is pulling down $1,054,437, which combined with the league average stats make the value look like this.

$2,361 per receiving yard
$362,463 per touchdown

I’m sure the extra cash is thrown in because he’s such a good locker room guy.



So, yeah about that whole “loaded gun down pants with safety off” thing. Honestly, the best part of the story is that fact that Burress checked into the hospital under the name “Harris Smith” and told the doctors that he was shot at an Applebee’s.

Sadly, like the Falcon’s Ron Mexico jersey, the NFLShop has already shut down people attempting to buy #17 Giants’ H. Smith jerseys.



Well, have fun getting that big, shiny, new contract Mr. Smith. At least you know the Raiders will be ready to sign you.

Patriot Peeling

Haven't had that much fun watching the Beloved kick ass in a long time. Beliturd (in drenched hoodie) crying after Ike Taylor taunted Gaffney, James Harrison beating Matt Light on every single snap, Moss looking like a dear in headlights at the end of the game, and Casey Hampton bowling over the Pats O-line in route to burying Cassel. This though, had to be the highlight...



Worth every single inch of the 15 yard penalty that was assessed (in the new age NFL, hard hitting is not permitted).

The only thing that would've made this hit better, is if it would've been on Moss. But Randy doesn't come across the middle. He was too busy dropping passes and looking clueless.

A thorough tit peeling by the Steeler. I can't believe I bet on the Pats. But like Ryan Clarke's inevitable fine, it was worth every single penny.

And HEY! The offensive line played well. Superbowl?

An oldie, but goodie...