...randomness surrounding Guided by Voices, Robert Pollard, and other great indie rock bands; a quasi objective look at "my" sporting teams; the random horror film; plus other crap as we see fit...all with a Pittsburgh based feel.

Friday, October 30, 2009

"Calls Him Fat..."

Mike Leach on Texas Tech getting dominated in last week's game.



I Drink Your Blood
tonight.

The requested TFC post coming sometime this weekend.

Fortuna Dusseldorf in 40 minutes, let's go.

Thursday, October 29, 2009

Horror for the Whole Family



I know what you're thinking: Hey G...where's all those fun and exciting horror films you recommend this time of year? I know...I've been lax with a bunch of travel. But that doesn't mean I haven't indulged in my normal horror routine in between the rock n' roll lifestyle weekends.

This Halloween fell on the weekend (that's a Geto Boys lyric for those not down). So you, the wife, and kids need to run down to the local Family Video and get your mitts on some of these nuggets...

I Drink Your Blood (1970)

This grindhouse classic will change your life. I swears. It changed mine. Hippy satanists, meat pies, rabies, a large headed kid, and rat-kabob. This all equals instant classic. It was also the first film ever to be "Rated X" for its violence alone. The DVD is full of extras you'll be sure to enjoy. Rent or buy this now, and make sure that "Rollo Yates" is a household name with your family this Halloween...



BTW...

I Drink Your Blood and Mr. Vampire III will playing as a double feature at the Andy Warhol Museum THIS Friday, starting at 7:00, as part of the "SuperTrash Film Series." My co-hort Yost tells me that director David Durston will be in attendance. Tickets = $10 cheap

Don't Go In the House (1980)

Memo to parents: Don't burn your kids. Perhaps the best film ever involving a steel room and a flamethrower...



Prince of Darkness (1987)

I'm more of a slasher and zombie fan than I am of the supernatural stuff. But this is one cool film. Highlighted by director John Carpenter's typical creepy music....




The Burning (1981)

Can't blame Harvey Weinstein for wanting to get in on the slasher genre spearheaded by the likes of Halloween and Friday the 13th. It's not as good as either of those two (or a few others for that matter), but The Burning is pure bliss. Yeah, the plot is a familiar one, but who gives a crap? Death by scissors is always interesting, and it's highlighted by some great special effect kill scenes by the master Tom Savini, including the initial burning.

Not only did The Burning launch the careers of the Weinstein Bros, but also that of Jason Alexander and Holly Hunter. No shit.



Emanuelle and the Last Cannibals (1977)

OK...this is one of those films, as you're watching it, you feel a great deal of shame. It's one of those films you don't tell other people that you actually watched. You feel really dirty watching it. So here I am to tell you about it....

Emmanuelle is much more porn than it is horror. Actually, it's everything you could want in a pure exploitation film: lots of nakedness and sex, followed by cannibals eating people. I'm told from a good friend that there's a slew of these "Emmanuelle" films, so if you and the family enjoy this one, maybe you can devote a whole night to her...perhaps during the upcoming holidays.



House On the Edge of the Park (1980)


Unlike other reviewers, I don't believe that Italian director Ruggero Deodato (also known for the 1980 classic Cannibal Holocaust) was trying to capitalize on the Last House on the Left character Krug. Don't be mistaken...this ain't Krug. This is Alex. And Alex likes to rape and pillage (but more rape). Think Disco Krug. Unlike Last House, there's no forced piss-your-pants scenes. But there's a great twist at the end, which I'll let you see for yourself. Oh..and lots of torture and rape stuff. I won't lie...you and your family may feel a little weird after watching this one...



So have a safe and fun Halloween from all of us here at Empties Crushed. I leave you and your family with the greatest "Bastard" scene of all time, from the 1982 chainsaw classic, Pieces...

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Only #4?

The city of Gulph's second favorite Pittsburgh bar has made a national list, of the best bars to throw up in.

I'm not sure if it's straight compliment, or a backhanded one. Either way, I'm looking forward to repeat trip.

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

7 STEPS!

So, opening night of the NBA. I'm not a big fan, but there is nothing else on, so what the hell...

Five minutes in, I get this.



On second count, it wasn't five steps, it was seven. How does anyone get into this?

Monday, October 26, 2009

Monday Picks

The five can't lose picks of the day. (Yesterday 4-1; Overall 4-1)

NFL: Philadelphia -7.5 over Washington - Do you even think Zorn wants to win a game? They club tries to force him into quitting, but he'd rather collect the paychecks. He's going to be gone at season's end, while the Eagles need to redeem themselves from that humiliation last week. Monday night rout.

Championship League: Reading +140 over Leicester - It's time for a turnaround for the royals. Reading hasn't tasted defeat on Monday yet this season, and it isn't changing now. Bonus play, take the over (2.5).

NHL: Anaheim (-180) over Toronto - Leafs are terrible.

NHL: New York Islanders and Montreal over (5.5) - Scoring is up in the league on Mondays, and the over defense in this game will be poor.

NBA Pre-Season: Washington and Dallas under (205) - Mavericks have no shooting presence thus far, and it's the pre-season.

Sunday, October 25, 2009

Sunday Picks

The five can't lose picks of the day. (My kneecaps and I can not be held responsible if you do lose with these picks)

NFL: New York Jets -6 over Oakland - Forget about last weekend, it doesn't erase the last 3 years. The is a perfect bounce back game for New York. They'll roll.

NFL: Chicago (pick 'em) over Cincinnati - Ohio can go back to sleep and wait for the Cavs' season to start. The Bengals are not good, they were just hot for a short while, that's over. Chicago is the better team, you'll see it in a few hours.

NFL: New Orleans -6.5 over Miami - Last time the fish faced a dominant quarterback with a potent offense their defense was on the field for about 15 minutes, and they still lost... easily. If you want to be a little daring, take the over (48) as well.

MLB: Anaheim and New York Yankees under 9.5 - That field is going to be soft and Pettite take the mound for the 'keys. Despite large run totals thus far in the series, pitching will dominate and runs will come at a premium.

England FA Cup: Cambridge United -333 over Lincoln United - I said they were can't lose picks, not necessarily profitable picks.

Friday, October 23, 2009

ESPN/Deadspin: Updated

I know many of you probably aren't enjoying this nearly as much as I am, but I'm throw around the minimal weight that my posting privilidges allow. Bitches.

ESPN did release a response to Deadspin's secret sharing.




A lot of bitterness being spewed by the ESPN brass. However, noticeably lacking in the response, anything remotely close to a denial.

Then today, from the New York Post, the confession.

Berson, whom Business Week ranks as the 73rd most powerful man in sports, finalized his divorce from his ex-wife Jane in March, a source said. Lacey and Berson first found romance together two years ago, the source said. A separate ESPN source confirmed Berson and Lacey had been dating for a long time.


I'm sorry, but this is too amusing.

25.5 hours till TFC.

Thursday, October 22, 2009

Deadspin/ESPN and Michael Jordan's Son



The best way to start this post is to plug a different blog, Deadspin. Currently, the ubersportsblog is cleaning out the inbox of tips they've received about ESPN employee sexcapades. This is in response to the Steve Phillips' boning of a 22-year-old production assistant.

Basically, Deadspin got word of the Phillips story a day in advance and called the four letter network to confirm the forthcoming Phillips absence. Rather than going "no comment" the network said that the story was completely false, except it wasn't. Not being the first time Bristol has snubbed, blacklisted, or lied to the blog, Deadspin has responded by throwing some (maybe all?) of it's ESPN employee liaison stories out to the public. Followed by an invitation to ESPN to comment as they'd like. They're all good reads, and worth a bit of your time.



However, my favorite story of the day comes out of the University of Central Florida, where Marcus Jordan, better known to all of us as the son of Michael Jordan, is refusing to play basketball unless he can wear his father's sneakers. While it's not uncommon for the offspring of famous people to follow the career path of their parent(s), most attempt to set themselves apart from their famous namesake, and forge their own identity. Not Son of Michael Jordan, he's fighting with every bit to stay as firming connecting to that vast, bald shadow that he can. I think we know which side of the family Son of Michael Jordan got his ego from.

As endorsement savvy as Michael Jordan is, you would think he would have instilled in his son, Son of Michael Jordan, that you need to check into potential endorsement conflicts of interest before signing up. I hope that UCF tells Son of Michael Jordan that he can ride the bench, if that, until he understands that he has no special rights, and gets treated the same as his teammates.

However, I expect UCF to cave in.

49.5 hours til TFC...

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Jeff Reed is a douche bag



Does the man in this picture not scream, "hit me, I'm a douche bag."? He voluntarily posed like that, knowing his picture was being taken. WTF!

I support the special team players as much as or more than anyone else you know. However, I'm jumping off the Jeff Reed bandwagon. This little drunken cop fighting incident aside, he's been one of the more obnoxious parts of this club for the past couple of years. I mean, look at that picture, it's beyond agitating.

NFL kickers (and punters, not that Daniel will ever be an issue) are like head coaches, only 32 people in the world get be one of them, and there are plenty more capable people to fill those positions, should you fall out of favor. Step your game up, party at places a little better than McFadden's, tell your teammates to step back inside the bar to take a leak, try not fighting the cops, allegedly, and maybe you'll get to stick around a bit longer.

Monday, October 19, 2009

TFC 1 - RSL 0



Another great weekend with the kids from Canadia. Saturday night can't get here any faster.

However, the other part of this game was the 250X40 ft. banner being made for Danny Dichio. This was a combined effort of the Red Patch Boys and the U-Sector supporter groups.




It was amazing in person...




Now, onto this weekend's regular season ending schedule of games. Thanks to my amazing copy and paste abilities, below is the cheat sheet to knowing what it takes to get TFC into the post-season for the first time in club history.

TFC WIN vs NY, hope for:

Colorado vs RSL - draw or RSL win
Dallas vs Seattle - draw or Seattle win

... just one of those results needs to happen for TFC to get in with a win

TFC DRAW vs NY, hope for:

Colorado vs RSL - draw or Colorado win AND
Dallas vs Seattle - Seattle win AND
NE vs Columbus - draw or Columbus win AND
DC vs KC - draw or KC win


Piper's on Saturday night, Do It!

Thursday, October 15, 2009

Captain's Dead

R.I.P.



Lou Albano will always be remembered in these parts for managing my favorite wrestler as a kid, The Magnificent Muraco. I recall being younger, and trying to imitate Captain Lou by stapling rubber bands to my face. And then wanting to beat the crap outta any of my friends who chanted "Beach Bum" at my boy Muraco. Oh, the memories...

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Dre's going to be Dre'

I guess so...



Can't think of what's more hilarious: The fact that Dre' Bly says he doesn't regret his bonehead move, or that he refers to himself in the third person.

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Hockey Night in Canada

Found this over at Pensblog. If you haven't seen it yet, a pretty kick ass intro for this past Saturday's Pens / Leafs game. Meanwhile, FSN is busy sucking...

Monday, October 12, 2009

Crosby Sucks! Crosby Sucks! (Hartnell Bites)


(catching up...)

Every time Sir Sid stepped into the face-off circle last Thursday, the Cro-Magnons at the Wach started their cute little chant. Meanwhile, 87 walked away with an 87.5% win rate, snagging 21 of the 24 face-offs he took. I guess he was affected.

I know...this sounds like a broken record around these parts. Every time the Pens play the scum bag Flyers, we get a chance to pull out the hate card and enjoy a laugh at their expense. It's almost too easy.

The Flyer philosophy has worked so well the last 35 years, why stray? Bring in more dirt bags: Chris Pronger, Ian Laperriere, and Ray Emery. These guys should fit in nicely with dildos like Debbie Carcillo, Riley Cote, and Scott Hartnell.

Pronger is slow, and well past his prime. But hey!! He's one of the league's dirtiest players, so he should fit in fine in Philly. Pronger was a non-factor all night, unless you consider his inability to avoid hits from Craig Adams and Matt Cooke a good thing.

Ian Laperriere is pretty much useless, in the same mold as Carcillo. Maybe he'll make the Flyer pre-game fight video , but he won't be helping these dopes get any further than they did last year.

And Ray Emery has drawings of famous boxers on his cage, which is obviously the reason the Flyers sought him in the off season. Emery was a sieve all night, and basically looked like a deer in headlights. Just as I used to remember him. The Rocky Balboa drawing on the back of Emery's cage saw as much rubber in the back of the net as Emery saw all night in front of him.

But the leader of the pumpkin-sweatered douche bags is obviously Hartnell. Bozo reached new depths of the scum pit when he actually bit Kris Letang in the scrum at the end of the game. Nothing surprises us anymore with these ass clowns.

And I know there's a bunch of Mike Richards fans out there, but it's official. The temperament of the world's most moronic sports franchise has taken over Richards, who will probably never reach his full potential until he is outta Philly. Richards took a run at MAF to end the game, taking a cheap shot to Fleury's head in the process. Oddly, Richards was nowhere to be found in that same scrum as he sheepishly laid on the ice acting like he was hurt so no one would kick his ass. He was last seen skating away from the fray while the rest of his teammates gooned it up. Richards = Douche.

Pens. Winner. Flyers. Loser. Again.

End of game funsies...

Tuesday, October 06, 2009

Boston Spaceships: Zero to 99


If you don't already have this, you are not cool. Be cool, and go now to your local Factory of Raw Essentials. As with all new releases, the vinyl comes with a free CD-R. More great stuff from Bob, including the tune below "How Wrong You Are." Magnet calls it "possibly the best song Robert Pollard has recorded since the demise of Guided By Voices."

Listen below:

MP3 At 3PM: Boston Spaceships

Posted using ShareThis

Monday, October 05, 2009

John Buccigross likes the Pens and cool music

Interesting little read from maybe the only person at ESPN who cares about hockey.

He's got the Pens back atop the Eastern Conference and apparently is an indie / alt rawk fan. Only wish he would've picked a better act than Ben Folds to represent the Penguinos.

READ HERE: John Buccigross: Breaking down the Eastern Conference

Friday, October 02, 2009

Jay Reatard: It Ain't Gonna Save Me

GREAT vid from an even better record. Watch Me Fall...BUY HERE.



All is lost There is no hope!!

this Pitchfork.tv thingy is really neato.

Thursday, October 01, 2009

My Quasi Pompous Ode to 1989 (part 4 of 4)

Here it is, kids. The moment all 5 of you have been waiting for. The jaw dropping, show stopping conclusion to this stupid little list we started back on Monday. I'm tired of recapping, so if you'd like to see #20 - #6, see below or click HERE for the EC home page.

#5 - The Stone Roses: "I Wanna Be Adored"

From their much acclaimed debut and self-titled album, The Stone Roses. Another in the long line of great bands who hailed from Manchester during this time period.



Go HERE for a better video (embedding was disabled)

#4 - Fugazi: "Waiting Room"

I AM A PATIENT BOY!!!!! Hell. Yes. If you watch one video of these 20 tunes, make it this one...




#3 - The Jesus & Mary Chain: "Head On"


The Pixies would later cover this on their 1991 Trompe le Monde record, but we prefer these Scottish shoegazers' version better.

"And the way I feel tonight...I could die and I wouldn't mind"



#2 - The Pixies: "Debaser"

Third greatest band of all-time, imho. Real tough to choose one track off the Doolittle album, as it was by far my favorite record of the year. "Here Comes Your Man" and "Monkey Gone to Heaven" were probably the more popular tunes. Also under consideration were "La La Love You", "Wave of Mutilation", "Hey", and "Gouge Away". If it wasn't for the self-imposed "one song per group" thingy, more from this album would've made the Essential 20. So we choose the opening track.

The lyrics from "Debaser" are supposedly referring to a 1920's French film called Un chien andalou. Go HERE for the trailer. "Slicing up eyeballs" is apparently a shot in the short 15 minute film. Cool.

"Girly so groovy!!!"




#1 - Guided By Voices: "Navigating Flood Regions"




No brainer. From the greatest band ever. From Self-Inflicted Aerial Nostalgia. Only 500 were originally pressed, so if you have one of these originals in your collection, you are a lucky person. Also under consideration from this record was "Liar's Tale", but this track is probably one of my all-time favorite GBV tunes. OK, I'll say it...Top 10, easy.

Guilty admission: For the longest time, I always thought the lyric was "The shit floats but it won't float away." But anyone who knows me, knows I have a habit of botching lyrics. Straight from gbvdb.com, here's the actual lyrics for you to sing along, from the greatest songwriter to ever grace the planet....

Spy ??shouting?? the crew let's string him up
Wise up to the captain where's my coffee cup
And it's been an adventurous day
The ship floats but it won't float away
Let's us stay
Don your favorite costume here we go
Belt a song if you're not real long and slow
And you doing a wonderful job
Shaping up with a competent mob
It's your job
It's as long as wide and just beginning
Been around for aeons just like me
Grab your money and let's go for all the winnings
Cast your soul into the jagged sea
It's the number on your head
Now you're dead
Stuff you down the barrel of a cannon
Let you see the world as something to see
Take you to the corners of the playground
Let you watch the traffic through the trees
It's the number on your head
Now you're dead
And we run as the war trumpet blows
And the judge with the list of no-shows


- Robert Pollard, Needmore Songs

Turn up your speakers. Guide your mouse over the image below. Play. Rawk. Enjoy.








Thought I could find some video footage from their 2004 Electrifying Conclusion doing "Navigating Flood Regions", but I failed. Since I love yinz so much, here's a bonus track, also from Self-Inflicted Aerial Nostalgia..."Chief Barrel Belly":